Editing Fragments

Fragments are dependent clauses that incorrectly mask as sentences. You cannot let a dependent clause be punctuated with a period when it is all by its lonely!



Identifying fragments:  look for dependent clauses that start sentences but lacks a subject or verb modified by that clause.  Read your sentences aloud and ask: Who is doing what in this sentence? 

Here are some common errors we can identify as half thoughts, dependent thoughts:

• Prepositional phrases  (ex.:  “During the war.”)
• –ing verb starts off   (ex.: “Beginning the story over.”)
• infinitive form starts off  (to verb, ex.:  “To command the army.”)
• Relative clauses starts off  (who, that, which, whose, ex.: “Which was awesome.”)
• Appositives on their own. ( ex.:  “The first president.”)
• No verb (action), or no subject doing the action

Methods for fixing:

• First, identify fragments by doing the subject-verb-object test. You may want to read the piece backwards to slow down and catch more possible errors:

• Underline the subject
• Circle the verb
• Box in the object

• If you are missing one of the above, you likely have a fragment; something or someone must be done onto something or someone else! 

1.     Add a subject and verb prior to the existing fragment and lower-case the fragments first word to show proper mechanics.

• Example fragment:  During the war.
• Fix:  We fought during the war

2. Change the period into a comma, then add the subject and verb.

• Example fragment:  During the war.
• Fix grammar: During the war, we fought. 
• Improve idea by adding a modifier:  During the war, we fought for oil deals. 

2.     Or, it is likely that your fragment is just improperly attached to the sentence before or after it. If this is the case, add the phrase to the sentence next to it that you are most likely using the fragment to modify by: 

• If you are attaching the fragment to the beginning of the next sentence, you will need a comma before the subject!

• We had to be back at the office in twenty minutes. To save time. We ordered cold sandwiches.
•  We had to be back at the office in twenty minutes. To save time, we ordered cold sandwiches.

• If you are attaching the fragment to the end of the last sentence because it modifies the object, then erase the period of that sentence and lowercase the first word of the fragment.

Assignments to do going in to Spring Break

From class, make sure to post your two paragraphs by Friday night, 3/11:

•  Provide your introduction and first body paragraph draft, in Word (.doc or .docx).

Essay 2: 

• Your entire draft is due on Monday, 3/21, typed, from the feedback given on your uploading of the above assignment.

HW for 3/21

1. Print and bring in Essay 2 revised from feedback so that I can grade and it get it back to you quickly.

2. Read Rules for Writers chapters on run-ons and fragments.

3. ...

Writing Scholarly College Conclusions

The last paragraph (or sometimes paragraphs, when writing much longer essays) should reflect upon the thesis statement and its subtopics that you have addressed in your essay. 

However, there are other ways to view your conclusions, and viewing a conclusion in these different ways will help guide you in what else you can say beyond being repetitive.

Another way of looking at just conclusions and the above general conclusion definition, according to the University of Iowa's Writing center: "The conclusion is a good place to not only sum up the points made in the paper but to suggest the further implications of your argument.  You do not want to simply reiterate the points you have made in your introduction, thesis, or body paragraphs.  Instead, use the analyses that you have already presented to ask questions, or suggest the possible next logical step in the argument.  You can use the conclusion to draw connections between your chosen text and its genre and historical or cultural contexts.  You want to make sure that the claims you make in the conclusion are not too far-fetched or wildly out of step with the rest of your paper.  The conclusion should be the final step in the progression of your argument."

You likely will not address each question below each time, but here are some general ideas you may explore in your conclusion rather than simply "restating the thesis." (As a writer, you may find some of these thoughtful actions are useful for other parts of your essay...):

• What is important to the general audience/larger world about what you have argued/analyzed/defined. etc.? What knowledge do you provide us, and why is that important? 

• What is the impact of this knowledge I provide ? Who is affected, how? 

• Where does my idea fit in the larger discussion of the subject addressed in the essay? 

• Quickly state comparison or contrast with socially common views, stereotypes, and/or subjects.

• What recommendations can I make, and why, based on my thesis and other points made in the essay? Or, what recs do I have based on the source author's ideas?

• What is another major point or two about the subject that I did not have 'time' to include in this essay? 

• Pose questions that you haven't addressed that are relevant to what you have already written. 

• Pose questions that further help reader understand the subject's context.

• Suggest next possible step in the author's argument.

• Suggest different types of evidence that were not used in author's argument.

• In third person, briefly provide your own thoughts on any examples used from your source author that matter to you. 

• Example: Tamir Rice...

• Have you read other articles, books, etc., on the subject? Draw connections between your essay subject text and well-known texts in the genre or same time period or cultural perspective. 

HW for 3/9

1. Submit pictures of your objects that show discrimination to Blackboard discussion board "Objects of Discrimination." 

2. Bring in a typed, and as a saved a file, an outline for Essay 2. I am giving you time in class on Wednesday to write your first draft of Essay 2 (from the outline, which you will hand in).   

• Make sure to do the free-writes to help get your ideas out
• Then, make sure to use the Crafting Thesis Statements handout from Unit 1 on Blackboard to help you craft your thesis and topic sentences

3. We will do the Midterm after Spring Break. Thanks to the weather and to my own lungs, we are behind. We will get there, I promise.

Essay 2

Essay #2 | Trending: Problem-Solution for a Marginalized Group

Worth: 100 points total

Process Due Dates:

·      Start of class, Wednesday, 3/9: Bring in a typed, and as a saved a file, an outline for Essay 2

·      End of Wednesday’s class, 3/9: have at least introduction and first body paragraph written, and you will post to Blackboard as a .doc or .docx

·      Start of class, Monday, 3/21: Bring in a typed, revised Essay 2 (after taking my feedback from Blackboard)

Format Guidelines:    

                                                                      

·      Header, @ top left-hand corner:        

Name

ENGL 002

Assignment

Title

·      MLA format: 12 pt. font, either Times New Roman, Calibri or Cambria; double-spaced

·      Use of rhetorical conventions, including 5-paragraph essay format. Must be at least four paragraphs (intro, two body paragraphs, conclusion)

·      450-500 words  (work towards two complete pages)

·      A Title that acts like a second thesis!

Prompt: Write a 450- to 500-word essay in which you pursue the following prompt:

Choose a minority group (ethnic, racial, religious, gender, sexual orientation, or more) that you feel is prejudiced against.

In an essay using the problem-solution organizational patter, identify a problem and explore why you think this problem exists. Also, identify and explore two specific solutions.

 Descriptive language and concrete examples are a must, but so is solid critical thinking about the problem. Your goal is to, from the first draft to the last, get more and more specific with your points. Use both historical and personal examples that speak to you, individually, but also ones that you will not have to provide cited sources for in the essay.

Multiple Free-writes to get your brain going on the many possibilities of such a topic: 

Pick a stereotype.

#1: Think about the types of prejudice things you have heard, read, or been told by other. Write down all the negative points of view that come to mind (10 minutes)

#2: Write down all of the positive points you can about the group being stereotyped. (10 minutes)

#3: What are some things that you want to be done to make life more equal in America? Just go, go, go, without trying to edit yourself (15 minutes)

HW for Monday, 3/7

1. Bring in your revised and edited Essay 1, which will be graded. Most importantly, try some new things in the essay so that I can give you feedback on the success of what you worked on.


2. Show & Tell: We will continue to discuss the landays and the essay from which they come from. To help us think about the importance of such a subject:

• Bring in a text, an object, or something else in society that you think shows us some kind of discrimination that exists in our society.